GoQuorum allows to configure the contract dize limit by using maxCodeSize and maxCodeSizeConfig arguments in the genesis file (the latter allows to configure by block). More information on https://docs.goquorum.consensys.net/en/stable/HowTo/Configure/GenesisOptions/#contract-code-size.
Those values can be configured between 24kb and 128kb.
As the new node is running from within a VM, this issue is most probably a network issue that's why the nodes are not able to communicate with each other. To double check that maybe use nc or telnet commands.